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  1. #1
    Maverick
    2Manboobs's Avatar
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    Danica proves yet again: even a trained retarded Monkey could drive a car in circles

    ..and be competitive in NASCAR

    All 5'-2" & 115 pounds of her




    Danica Patrick wins pole for NASCAR's Daytona 500


    DAYTONA BEACH, Fla. (AP) — Danica Patrick has won the Daytona 500 pole, becoming the first woman to secure the top spot for any Sprint Cup race.

    It was the biggest achievement of her four-year NASCAR career.

    Patrick went out eighth in the qualifying session Sunday and covered the 2½-mile superspeedway in 45.817 seconds, averaging 196.434 mph.

    "Hopefully, there are good things to come," Patrick said.

    She waited about two hours as 37 fellow drivers tried to take her spot. Only four-time Cup champion Jeff Gordon even came close to knocking her off.

    Gordon was the only other driver who topped 196 mph. He locked up the other guaranteed spot in next week's season-opening Daytona 500.

    "It's great to be part of history," Gordon said. "I can say I was the fastest guy today."

    The rest of the field will be set in duel qualifying races Thursday.


  2. #2
    Sorcerer Supreme
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    Boon.

  3. #3
    Maverick
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gitfiddle View Post
    Boon.

    She's Caucasian, I believe

  4. #4
    Sorcerer Supreme
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    Quote Originally Posted by 2Manboobs View Post
    She's Caucasian, I believe
    I know, I just thought this thread needed someone to say boon.

  5. #5
    Maverick
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gitfiddle View Post
    I know, I just thought this thread needed someone to say boon.

    I try not to use that word frivolously

  6. #6
    "is just really nice?"
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gitfiddle View Post
    I know, I just thought this thread needed someone to say boon.
    This thread, and every other.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gitfiddle View Post
    I know, I just thought this thread needed someone to say boon.
    Thief!!!


















































    degenerate















































    Hi Schmoop

  8. #8
    Maverick

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    good ole boys will wreck her

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by xyster View Post
    good ole boys will wreck her

    when you cant drive faster than a broad, just throw a tantrum & crash her out ...

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by 2Manboobs View Post
    when you cant drive faster than a broad, just throw a tantrum & crash her out ...
    thats what i do on 95
    "not when he looked so fierce"

  11. #11
    Maverick

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    Quote Originally Posted by 2Manboobs View Post
    when you cant drive faster than a broad, just throw a tantrum & crash her out ...

    incorrect..its all about her getting all the money,strictly because she is a female..commercials and all the money people wanting to be part of her team


    she does not{drive faster} than anyone else

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by xyster View Post

    she does not{drive faster} than anyone else

    Well... Turns out she DID during qualifying for the biggest race of the 2013 season ...Nnnnderp


    1. Danica Patrick, 196.434
    2. Jeff Gordon, 196.292
    3. Trevor Bayne, 195.976
    4. Ryan Newman, 195.946
    5. Tony Stewart, 195.925
    6. Kasey Kahne, 195.852
    7. Denny Hamlin, 195.771
    8. Kyle Busch, 195.767
    9. Joey Logano, 195.767
    10. Matt Kenseth, 195.725
    11. Dale Earnhardt Jr., 195.584
    12. Ricky Stenhouse Jr., 195.538
    13. Juan Pablo Montoya, 195.508
    14. Paul Menard, 195.503
    15. Casey Mears, 195.495
    16. Austin Dillon, 195.385
    17. Carl Edwards, 195.240
    18. Clint Bowyer, 195.228
    19. Martin Truex Jr., 195.207
    20. Jeff Burton, 195.156
    21. Jimmie Johnson, 195.084
    22. Jamie McMurray, 195.042
    23. Brad Keselowski, 194.961
    24. Marcos Ambrose, 194.793
    25. Kevin Harvick, 194.742
    26. Aric Almirola, 194.742
    27. Greg Biffle, 194.729
    28. Mark Martin, 194.683
    29. David Gilliland, 194.654
    30. David Ragan, 194.616
    31. Michael Waltrip, 194.313
    32. Josh Wise, 194.254
    33. Kurt Busch, 193.657
    34. Michael McDowell, 193.544
    35. Scott Speed, 193.540
    36. Terry Labonte, 193.515
    37. Regan Smith, 193.006
    38. Dave Blaney, 192.996
    39. Bobby Labonte, 192.563
    40. J.J. Yeley, 192.094
    41. David Reutimann, 190.339
    42. Travis Kvapil, 190.142
    43. Joe Nemechek, 190.046
    44. Mike Bliss, 186.974
    45. Brian Keselowski, 183.876

  13. #13
    Maverick
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    Quote Originally Posted by xyster View Post
    incorrect..its all about her getting all the money,strictly because she is a female..commercials and all the money people wanting to be part of her team


    she does not{drive faster} than anyone else
    Money comes from sponsorship.... Consistent sponsorship comes from doing well ...Having a vagina will only take you so far without a win or top 3 finish.... Just ask Janet Guthrie, Lynn St.James, & Sarah Fisher (Whose time in the limelight, without a win or top 3 finish, didn't last very long)

  14. #14
    Maverick

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    hate that skank

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by 2Manboobs View Post
    ..and be competitive in NASCAR

    All 5'-2" & 115 pounds of her




    Danica Patrick wins pole for NASCAR's Daytona 500


    DAYTONA BEACH, Fla. (AP) — Danica Patrick has won the Daytona 500 pole, becoming the first woman to secure the top spot for any Sprint Cup race.

    It was the biggest achievement of her four-year NASCAR career.

    Patrick went out eighth in the qualifying session Sunday and covered the 2½-mile superspeedway in 45.817 seconds, averaging 196.434 mph.

    "Hopefully, there are good things to come," Patrick said.

    She waited about two hours as 37 fellow drivers tried to take her spot. Only four-time Cup champion Jeff Gordon even came close to knocking her off.

    Gordon was the only other driver who topped 196 mph. He locked up the other guaranteed spot in next week's season-opening Daytona 500.

    "It's great to be part of history," Gordon said. "I can say I was the fastest guy today."

    The rest of the field will be set in duel qualifying races Thursday.

    Quote Originally Posted by xyster View Post
    hate that skank

    after all that sitting in a hot car for 2 hours turning left, her pussy smells like rotten tuna

  16. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gomez El Fartknockero View Post
    after all that sitting in a hot car for 2 hours turning left, her pussy smells like rotten tuna
    prolly
    Quote Originally Posted by nazdrowie View Post
    less words, more tits and ass..
    Quote Originally Posted by Chriza View Post
    BECAUSE EVERYONE IS SAYING THE STEAK IS SHITTY OH MY FUCKING GOD POPEYE I'M GOING TO KILL YOU IN REAL LIFE I'm getting a headache

  17. #17
    being 115 lbs is a huge advantage.

    huge

  18. #18
    Maverick
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    Quote Originally Posted by BaddFunn View Post
    being 115 lbs is a huge advantage.

    huge

    Not when you calculate in the loss of muscular strength when one is at this weight....

  19. #19
    Maverick
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    Quote Originally Posted by 2Manboobs View Post
    Not when you calculate in the loss of muscular strength when one is at this weight....
    In NASCAR, lack of weight is a greater advantage than muscle. Also, not a NASCAR fan but do you think you could also beat that field of retarded monkeys if given the opportunity?
    Ha'awi mahalo, lo'a mahalo

  20. #20
    Maverick
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gunslinger View Post
    In NASCAR, lack of weight is a greater advantage than muscle.
    And taller drivers have an advantage because they can see over the traffic ahead of them.

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