It's really real this time, really (again)... I was there. He started getting all mad, then yawn came in the room and asked what was up. Eric said "what the fuck?" then just started violently flailing... It was weird because his knees must have been backwards and connected because his legs twitched forward (almost as if he was desperately trying to swim somewhere using a reverse dolphin kick).
"Joo sthupeed sheet," said yawn,"ja kantfukkin svim. Ja has aklubfukin fut". Eric paid him no heed and just kept flapping his tail section, so violently that the wheelchairs brakes unlocked, sending him hurtling toward the top of the stairs. Yawn got there a second too late, and all we both could do was watch as Eric bounced down the staircase, somehow got ejected from his chair on the way down and landed smack dab in the middle of a pot of boiling water...
... We knew it was over when he turned the most beautiful shade of rusty orange.
The services are tonight. Anyone wishing to be in attendance should check in with their local red lobster franchise. In lieu of flowers, please bring lemon & butter. Casual dress (with bib) is recommended.