On the first day of christmas my true love gave to me, A god damn son of a bitch!!!

[renchfrieswith]

Still cracks me up after all these years.

On the first day of christmas my true love gave to me,
A god damn son of a bitch!!!
On the second day of christmas my true love gave to me,
Two bloody nuts,
And a god damn son of a bitch!!!
On the third day of christmas my true love gave to me,
Three severed heads,
Two bloody nuts,
And a god damn son of a bitch!!!
On the fourth day of christmas my true love gave to me,
Four rotting children,
Three severed heads,
Two bloody nuts,
And a god damn son of a bitch!!!
On the fith day of christmas my true love gave to me,
Five gotta schmeets!,
Four rotting children,
Three severed heads,
Two bloody nuts,
And a god damn son of a bitch!!!
On the sixth day of christmas my true love gave to me,
Six uclamings,
Five gotta schmeets!,
Four rotting children,
Three severed heads,
Two bloody nuts,
And a god damn son of a bitch!!!
On the seventh day of christmas my true love gave to me,
Seven chicken gizzards,
Six uclamings,
Five gotta schmeets!,
Four rotting children,
Three severed heads,
Two bloody nuts,
And a god damn son of a bitch!!!
On the eighth day of christmas my true love gave to me,
Eight doo-doo-doo-doo,
Seven chicken gizzards,
Six uclamings,
Five gotta schmeets!,
Four rotting children,
Three severed heads,
Two bloody nuts,
And a god damn son of a bitch!!!
On the ninth day of christmas my true love gave to me,
Nine, and
Eight doo-doo-doo-doo,
Seven chicken gizzards,
Six uclamings,
Five gotta schmeets!,
Four rotting children,
Three severed heads,
Two bloody nuts,
And a god damn son of a bitch!!!
On the tenth day of christmas my true love gave to me,
Ten debbie gizzards,
Nine, and
Eight doo-doo-doo-doo,
Seven chicken gizzards,
Six uclamings,
Five gotta schmeets!,
Four rotting children,
Three severed heads,
Two bloody nuts,
And a god damn son of a bitch!!!
On the eleventeenth day of christmas my true love gave to me,
Eleventeen s.t.l.d.'s,
Ten debbie gizzards,
Nine, and
Eight doo-doo-doo-doo,
Seven chicken gizzards,
Six uclamings,
Five gotta schmeets!,
Four rotting children,
Three severed heads,
Two bloody nuts,
And a god damn son of a bitch!!!
On the twelth day of christmas my true love gave to me,
Twelve tuna-twat,
Eleventeen s.t.l.d.'s,
Ten debbie gizzards,
Nine, and
Eight doo-doo-doo-doo,
Seven chicken gizzards,
Six uclamings,
Five gotta schmeets!,
Four rotting children,
Three severed heads,
Two bloody nuts,
And a god damn son of a biiiiiitch!!!!!!!

[Stevie]

[renchfrieswith]

I don't know why this cracks me up so much but I'm crying over here.

[Schmoopy]

So that's what Ralph Macchio did in-between The Karate Kid and My Cousin Vinny.

[zhukov]

lots of things are funny at 2am

[tomtom]

Could have saved a lot of words and just started at the twelfth day.

[renchfrieswith]

lots of things are funny at 2am

I used to be into the whole CKY/Jackass/skateboarding thing when I was in my teens. Just brings back funny memories, is all.