-- Thursday August 8, 2002 --
- Happy 50th Birthday Robin. 8/8/02. 6:05am
Howard had a little bit of a sore throat this morning and bragged that he didn't take a sick day today. He said he had to come in because it's Robin's 50th birthday today. She said she read the card he gave her and almost cried. Howard said it took three years of therapy for him to write what he did. He didn't read exactly what he wrote to her though.
- Howard said there were a lot of people who wanted to wish her a happy birthday but the only celebrity they could dig up right away was Artie. It turns out Fred had a whole CD full of celebrity birthday wishes for her. Fred said Howard wouldn't stop talking long enough for him to play any of the clips so that's why he didn't tell him he had the CD.
Howard said he had a mystery caller to wish Robin a happy birthday. As soon as everyone heard his voice they knew it was High Pitch Erik. He sang a few lines of ''Happy Birthday'' to her but Howard cut him off and hung up. A listener called in and asked what Robin is doing with Mr. X on her birthday. She said they'll probably just go to dinner. Howard went on to say that Robin's office was filled with flowers this morning. Robin said that she got flowers from her agent, Don Buchwald, and from Tom Chiusano and the radio station.
Howard changed subjects and talked about how the air conditioning in his apartment doesn't work and the people who fix it tell him there's not enough power in the building for it. The repairmen fix it for short periods of time though, so it can't be the power. Howard said he actually hates air conditioning so he's not completely freaked out by the situation but if he were some big fat guy, he'd be going crazy. Howard said they also tell him that it's the way the apartment is vented. Howard said he'd like to say the name of this company on the air so no one else will use them. Howard said he just wants them to get up there and fix the damn thing. He says he's going to tell the guy that if it's not fixed in three weeks he's going to give out a letter a day until he spells out the name of the company.
Howard took a call from someone who wanted to know if Robin has any grey hair in her pubic area. Robin said that she hasn't found any yet.
Throughout the show Howard played short clips of celebrities wishing Robin Happy Birthday. Some of them were phony clips with just regular people playing the voice of certain celebs. The clips included Colin Hanks, Dana Reeve, Chuck Norris, Antonio Banderas (Phony), Vin Diesel (Phony), Fred Durst, Smokin' Joe Frazier, Jonathan Davis, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Elizabeth Hurley (Phony), Alan Iverson (Phony), Jolene Blalock, Tom Hanks (Phony), Tobey Maguire, The Rock, Geraldo Rivera, Andy Dick and a few others.
Howard said he read an article about how two laptops are missing from a Military Command Center. Howard spent a few minutes talking about that and how incompetent they must be there.
Howard said he and Gary had a meeting yesterday and talked about what they're going to do for their 9/11 show. Howard said he heard that a lot of other stations are going commercial free all morning so he's thinking of doing that himself. That discussion led to the guys talking about some of the strange things that have happened since 9/11. Gary brought up a story about a woman who is suing an airline because they made her drink her own breast milk to prove it was safe since they had no idea what it was. Howard said that's not such a big sacrifice to ensure the safety of our country. He said the woman should drop the lawsuit and get over it.
Stuttering John came in and said that Ronnie the Limo Driver drank some breast milk at his party. For some reason he drank some of Brian Phelan's wife's breast milk out of a bottle. The guys think he did it because he was drunk. Howard said he'd never do anything crazy like that if he got drunk. He was also yelling at the party that Artie was the ''new Jackie'' and his girlfriend was the ''new Nancy'' and Jackie was at the party. Gary said he knew that when Ronnie hears about this he's going to come in and say ''What are you talkin' about?'' A few minutes later he came in and said ''What are you talkin' about?'' and had no idea that they predicted he'd say that. After being reminded about the breast milk thing he remembered it. He said he didn't yell about Artie being the new Jackie though.
Howard said that he got an advance copy of the Anna Nicole Smith show and got sucked into it. He didn't think that it was going to be that great but once he watch it he wanted more. He played a clip from the show where Anna is smothering her son with her hugs and kisses. The guys all said they feel sorry for that kid. Howard said E! has a hit on their hands with that show.
Robin brought up last night's ''American Idol'' and how they voted off one of ''the black women.'' Howard seemed to be surprised to hear that.
Howard said they got a lot of mail about Ryan Starr being on the show and a lot of them didn't think she was a good guest. Howard said he doesn't care though because she was hot. Artie said he wanted her back too.
- Comedian Dave Chappelle Comes In. 8/8/02. 6:50am
Howard said they had a special guest for Robin's birthday today... Eddie Murphy. It turned out to be comedian Dave Chappelle though. He said he came in just for Robin's birthday and didn't have anything to plug. Dave tried to figure out just how old Robin was and guessed that she was only 43. He was surprised to learn that she was 50.
- After taking a break Howard took some phone calls and one of them was ''You Skanky Ho'' Jeff. John the Stutterer also called in and said Robin looks like she's only 35. He was stuttering pretty bad and Fred wasn't helping things out by doing his impression of him. Robin said that was pretty hard for him so she really appreciated the call.
Howard brought up the party that Robin is throwing for Fred next week. Fred's birthday was on July 9th so it's a little late. Robin said that there will be about 35-40 people at the party. She said there will be some surprise guests there too. Fred thanked her in advance because he said he'd probably be miserable afterward.
Robin said they've picked out the type of cake he likes (chocolate, chocolate) and they'll have an open bar. Howard was happy to hear about the alcohol being available.
Robin said there will be about 5 tables at the restaurant and she'll probably have a designated table of honor which would include Howard and Fred. Howard said he doesn't really want that honor though.
Howard moved on and talked about his dinner with Gary, Jason and Will. Gary recently told Howard how great Jason and Will are doing their jobs. Howard said Jason types in the log for the show and Will books guests and does research for them. He went on to talk about going out to the restaurant Josephina. KC was also there and he doesn't eat much. Howard said he ordered chicken and didn't eat the skin or anything. Gary and Howard said he eats like a chick. Artie said he's a fascinating guy because he's the healthiest guy in the world but he's got a gambling problem.
He said he's at the track on a Wednesday afternoon while everyone else there looks like him (Artie). Howard said KC doesn't talk much. Jason and Will don't talk much either according to Howard. Gary said 3 years ago Will was a kid who wrote him a letter and idolized him, now he's working for him so he's a little overwhelmed. Will came in and said that he was talking but Howard said he was trying to get them to talk but it was tough. He called Will a dud.
Howard said there were some hot chicks at the table behind them so Howard was trying to get the guys to do work some magic with them but they didn't do anything. Jason came in and said he was a little nervous being out with Howard. Howard joked around and said that they should be more talkative when he takes them on the camping trip that's coming up.
When the guys left the restaurant Gary found a banana on his windshield. It turns out KC was in charge of the parking meter and he didn't have any change so he had to go buy something at someplace to get change. He bought a banana and just put it on Gary's windshield. The guys seem to think he's been hanging around with Jim Florentine too much and that's where he's getting these wacky ideas.
Will and Jason live together in the city since they don't make all that much money working for the show. Dave Chappelle joked that next season on NBC we'll see a new show called ''Will and Jason.''